Success Step IV - You Must Accept!

Here you are! You’ve made it this far on your road to success. At times the ride was smooth and at times it’s been a bit bumpy. That doesn’t matter. What does matter is that you stuck to it this far and you continue to move forward towards your goal.

Yet you’ve come to realize that even though you decided to be successful, you made a plan and you committed to do whatever it takes to be successful, it doesn’t always go accordingly.

This brings us to the fourth step of success:

“Success Step IV – You Must Accept!”

Success has a funny way of operating. I learned that the hard way. Every time I thought I finally made it something unexpected would turn up that would put me back a step or two.

There was a time I didn’t have $100 in my savings. So to try and save $2000 was an enormous undertaking. You can well imagine the pride I felt when I achieved that goal. It had taken some time, sure, but I did it.

I remember driving home, singing and tapping the steering wheel. I was in heaven and couldn’t wait to tell my wife. When I got home my joy was instantly crushed when my wife told me that her tooth had cracked and she needed to fix it.

She’d called a dentist and was told the procedure would run about $1800 give or take. We had no insurance of any kind at that time and would have to pay for it out of pocket.

What a major disappointment, what a bummer. Here I was trying my heart out to get ahead. When I finally did, even only a little bit, I was shut down once again.

My first reaction was “damn” followed by something more severe. Then, looking at my wife, seeing her standing there with tears in her eyes and a chipped front tooth, I realized that what mattered most to me was not the money I tried so hard to save but us. What good would it be if I had all the money in the world and enjoyed all the success I could handle if I didn’t have her to share it with?

I embraced her and told her it was OK. It could have been worse. She could have damaged her tooth at a time when we didn’t have the money. At least now with the money I had saved, we could fix the problem. Thank goodness for that. We smiled and hugged each other.

I learned there and then that you’ve got to accept the fact that things will not always go as planned. That’s just the way it goes. Accept it and move on. I learned not to linger on things that gave me a curveball. Instead I accept setbacks and use them as stepping stones.

Accept that once in a while you are going to get a few disappointments here and there. Because you made this decision to be successful and you’ve got this plan that you know will get you there, doesn’t mean it’s going to be smooth sailing.

I guarantee that if you learn to accept that part of becoming successful is learning how to overcome stumbling blocks, your victory will be a lot sweeter.

That day I learned to accept that things won’t always go the way you plan them and that’s ok. That lesson liberated me from the heavy burden of wanting to force my way to a better life.

Learn to accept that the road to success is paved with rocks. The moment you do you’ll find that the road to success has become a lot smoother and easier to travel because disappointments, which are sure to happen, won’t pull you down any more.

Once you discover this truth and you accept it, you will spiral into a new dimension; one where success is embracing you from every angle.

Best Wishes;

Lode

P.S. Next time: “Success Step V”. Stay tuned.

My Friend Ruben

Drinking and partying all night was his gig. After all, working in the most popular restaurant in town allowed him to be generous with his money. Besides, even if he squandered it all in just one night, at least he had a good time and the very next day he would make new cash.

That’s why he liked being a waiter. It didn’t matter if he spent all his money. The next day he would earn new tips. The restaurant he worked at was busy, the customers liked him very much and he was the best at what he did. Why worry?

And so Ruben continued his pattern of financial abuse and physical neglect day in day out for many years. One day, while working, he felt a sudden pain in his chest. The sting was so severe; it dropped him to his knees.

Later on at the hospital the doctor informed him he had a massive heart attack. The only reason he survived was because he was just 29 years old. “Just a few more years” the doctor told him and he would not have made it.

Completely shook up by the incident Ruben decided to mend his ways. The restaurant business was all he knew. He had no other skill and no degree of any kind. He decided he would continue to work there but he would no longer participate in all nighters.

Instead, he would save his hard earned money, invest it somehow and look forward to retire at an early age.

Several weeks after the incident occurred Ruben returned to work. He was greeted by his coworkers who instantly reminded him how they had missed him at the nightly gatherings. They told him how glad they were he was back and how much they were looking forward to having a great time later on.

That night, at the end of the shift, with his buddies all geared up to party, Ruben informed his friends he would no longer engage in this lifestyle. His friends tried to convince him to tag along: “Come on, just one drink!” “Yeh man, it’s been so long!” “Come on let’s go!”

Ruben held steadfast in his decision and after much argument eventually went home alone.

From that night forward Ruben went home alone while his friends went partying. Over time, Ruben was able to amass a small fortune. Investing his savings in real estate, Ruben retired a multi-millionaire at age 41.

His “friends” are still about, most of them still working in a restaurant here and there. On the few occasions they see each other, his friend tell him how smart he was to do what he did and how they wished they would have done it too.

Looking back at that night when he told his friends no, Ruben recalls:
“That was the saddest night of my life. By not joining my friends for drinks and laughs I knew I was no longer part of the club. Having to leave my friends behind like that was hard on me and hurt me an awful lot for a long time. It was also the best night of my life because on that night I took the first step to improving my life. Seeing at how my life is now I know I did the right thing. Now I have all the money I ever need to party all night long. Not that I want to but it’s nice to know that I can. As for my friends, that’s the life they chose for themselves and I wish them all the best. I was fortunate to have a heart attack. It actually taught me to take control of my life. I am glad it happened. As for advice I can give someone else? I guess I have to say, don’t wait for life to happen to you, make life happen for you.”

In case you’re wondering, I was one of Ruben’s drinking buddies. At 41 he retired while I had a pile of debt. I was lucky to have a friend like him. He showed me how I too could still create the life I wanted to have as long as I was willing to do something about it.

I listened, I learned and I did turn my life around. You can too. Let me guide you, let me show you how. Follow my lead and don’t quit. Eventually you too will be successful.

Best Wishes;

Lode

Success Step III - You Must Commit!

Now that you’ve decided to be successful no matter what and you’ve got a plan that you’re going to follow no matter what, it’s time you get going with Success Step III.

But before you do I must warn you. This step is without a doubt the hardest, most difficult of all the steps involved in the Success program.

This step will test your strengths and expose your weaknesses. This step will separate the corn from the shaft. No, I don’t mean to discourage you. No, I don’t mean to intimidate you. I do believe however in being up front.

Enough said, let’s get going!

“Success Step III – You Must Commit!”

It doesn’t matter at what stage of your life you are right now; if ever you want to be successful, you must commit; AKA: YOU MUST TAKE ACTION!

Going about success with an attitude of “I’ll do it later” or “tomorrow is time enough” will never get you there. That's a promise I give to you in writing.

So what do you do if you happen to be one of those procrastinating individuals? How are you going to go about making sure you commit yourself to your goal every single minute or every single day?

I’ll tell you how I do it. That’s right, I said “do” not did. There was a time when yours truly wasn’t always committed to the dream of being successful. I had an attitude of “Not right now; a little later.” Sitting in my favorite couch watching a no good for nothing show I had the hardest time to “get going”. Everything I did, I approached that way; you know: later.

Yet, day after day I complained bricks out the wall that my life sucked. Why wasn’t I able to get ahead? Why couldn’t I “make it”? I wasn’t dumb, I was physically strong. Why oh why oh why?

One day while repeating my favorite “Yeh, yeh, tomorrow!” thing; my wife stood in the kitchen washing dishes. Looking at her standing there I realized that the life I had promised my wife 15 years earlier and the life that I had given her were thousands of miles apart.

I had promised a life of bounty. Instead, I gave her a life of debt and struggle and daily hard work.

At that very moment I made up my mind that it wasn’t yet too late to make good on my promise. That was only five years ago. Today our lives are nowhere near where they used to be.

Now I look at my wife and I gleam from pure ecstasy. I made good on my promise because I committed to get of my butt (sorry) and do something about the situation I was in. Because I was committed to becoming successful, I was not only able to get rid of our debts, I was able to build a life of luxury at the same time.

It wasn’t easy. I most definitely had my days of wanting to sleep in just a bit longer. I certainly wasn’t always in the best of moods. And I absolutely had my setbacks. But I stuck it out because I committed to myself that I was going to change our lives no matter what.

Like I said earlier, this step isn’t easy. There are going to be days that you’re feeling blue, a bit lazy perhaps or a little under the weather. You ARE going to get them, count on it.

Find something that will be your driving force (your children, your current lifestyle, your empty bank account) to keep you motivated and you WILL be able to find new strength, new courage and a new attitude. Find that driving force and you WILL be able to commit yourself to your desire to be successful no matter what.

The day you commit that you are going to be successful no matter what is the day you are starting to be successful. Believe it. I know; been there done that!


Best Wishes;

Lode


Next issue: Success Step IV - Stay tuned.

Success Step II - You Must Plan!

So, you’ve made up your mind.  You have decided that no matter what you are going to be successful.  You are dead serious about it and no one can sway you from your decision.  

Congratulations.  You have now taken the very first step towards creating success in your life.   You’ll find that with this new attitude there is suddenly a new outlook on tomorrow.

Good, now let’s take the second step.

“Success Step II – You Must Plan!”

Decision alone isn’t going to get you there.  You can decide all you want but if you don’t have an idea on how to go about it to get successful, your decision will eventually fall on loose ground.

How do you plan?   It’s simple really.  Let’s say you have decided to become a professional singer, no matter what.  As such, you’re plan might be something like this:

1. You’re going to have your voice checked to make sure it’s good enough.


2. You’re going to keep your eyes and ears open for any and all singing auditions so that you can go to as many as possible.


3. You’re going to keep on taking vocal lessons to improve your voice even more.


4. You’re going to find a job to support you during your quest, but one that’s flexible enough to let you pursue your dream.


5. You’re going to take positive criticism constructively and ban negativity from your mind.


6. You’re going to take breathing lessons to improve your lung capacity so that you can really hold those long and high notes.


7. You’re going to keep on doing all these things and more no matter how long it takes.

I am not a professional singer and the plan above serves as an example.  You’ll notice that my plan does not contain any dates or time frames.  There is a reason for that.  I know, a lot of experts tell you that you must put a date on your plan in order for you to achieve it.

I agree, just not with my plan.  My plan is without date and time because it’s constant.  In other words, the plan you make to become successful is a plan that you execute every single minute of every single day until you’ve reached your goal.  The plan stops when you’ve reached your goal.  

You also noticed that the plan does not make any reference to money.  I found that making a plan that involves money doesn’t work simply because it discourages.   Imagine the plan would have read:  “I am going to take voice lessons.  For that I will need $1000!”  Slam, you just got hit in the face.  You don’t have $1,000.  And now your plan doesn’t work.  Do not worry about the money part.  I learned that if you truly want something, somehow, inexplicable, you’ll find a way to get where you want to get.

Don’t think so?  A friend of mine wanted to join a certain Karate gym.  Only problem was he didn’t have the money for the membership, the clothes and the gear.  His dad didn’t want to loan it to him because he made just enough to feed his family.

Desponded my friend went to that gym every day.  Every day he would stand at the window and gaze inside, looking at the teacher and the students honing their skills.  

After months of looking through the gym’s window every single day, the teacher took note of him.  He went outside and asked my friend to come in.  My friend told the teacher he’d better not.  He really wanted to join but he didn’t have the money and going inside not being able to participate, would break his heart.

The teacher scratched his chin.  Then he smiled and told my friend: “Come here every day, clean and dust the gym and I will train you for free!”  My friend is now a Karate teacher holding ranks in the highest degrees.

Colonel Sanders was told by everyone who ever tried it that he had the best chicken they ever ate.  So after he retired, he decided he was going to become rich and famous by selling his chicken recipe.

His plan was to wear a white suite and go restaurant to restaurant offering his recipe for a small percentage of the profit.  His plan also included that he would use his own car for transport as well as resting and sleeping quarters.   Additionally, the food he would eat would be the chickens that the restaurants cooked to try out his recipe.

That was his plan; short and simple.  Anyone hearing this would have and probably did say: “man, you are nuts!”  

He threw away negative criticism and didn’t allow it to deter him from his dream.  Restaurant after restaurant he stopped, offering his recipe for a percentage of the profits.  Restaurant after restaurant rejected him and showed him the door.

Try to imagine what his suite must have looked like after a while.  But he prevailed.  He had decided and he had a plan to get rich and famous from a chicken recipe.  After thousands of doors, yes thousands, closed in his face, one sunny afternoon, he entered a small but cozy restaurant.

The owner was a lady.  She was sweet and kind.  After giving his usual speech she decided to try out his recipe.  She liked the taste and texture of the chicken.  She believed that his recipe would most certainly improve her business and she saw no problem giving him a percentage of the profits.

The rest as they say is history:  Kentucky Fried Chicken was born.

So, go ahead, make your plan.  Do it now.  When your plan is ready, put it into action and let nothing stop you.  Like the Colonel, you’ll succeed.  I know because that’s what I did for 15 years.  Like the Colonel I stuck to it.  And like the Colonel I am now successful.  Guess what, you can too!  

Best Wishes;

Lode


Coming soon:  Success Step III.  Stay Tuned.

Success Lesson I - You Must Decide!

Success! Webster's dictionary defines it as “accomplishment, attainment, outcome”; a good explanation. I like to think of the word as “I made it!”

Whatever meaning you associate with the word success it is your view of what you wish to attain.

Even so, I have learned that in order to get the success you envision in your mind there are certain steps you must follow. I call these steps “Success Lessons”.

These lessons must be learned in the precise order given. Do not take one over the other, do not skip one, you'll fail. I know; been there done that.

So, if you're ready, let's get started. Take it to hart and you'll have your dream of success become reality. Don't follow it and well, you're on your own with no one to blame but yourself.

Enough said. Let’s go.

“Success Lesson I – Decide!”

That's right. Decide! I am not talking about a “let's go to the movies” or “let's go swimming” kind of decision. The decision I am talking about is the one that will change your life.

It wasn’t until I finally decided that I was going to be successful that I became successful. All the years prior I tried alright but wasn’t really committed. Not anymore. I made up my mind and decided.

Whatever your dream is, whatever it is you wish to accomplish, I guarantee that it will happen the moment you decide that’s what you want to do or be.

If your goal is to be a singer, a dancer, an accountant, a writer, an actor, whatever you choose, decide that’s what you truly want to be or do and you’ll see how almost out of nowhere, you’ll find an endless drive of energy that propels you to do things to accomplish your goal that you never thought or dreamed of doing.

The day I decided that I truly had enough of all the struggle was the day my lot changed. On that day I didn’t say: “Well, maybe I am going to try this!” No, on that day I said: “I am going to get what I want no matter what I got to do, no matter how long it takes because I am fed up with the life I got. I am going to be successful, no matter what.”

The absolute best example I can give you that once you decide your life will open up to you is the story of Allen Iverson, lead player of the 76ers basketball team.

While still in junior high, Iverson dreamed of being a professional basketball player. He was athletic, had a passion for the game and better than average at playing basketball. But he had a problem. Compared to other kids who joined a basketball team with the hopes of becoming a star, Allen was too short; really short.

Where other players reached a height of well over 6ft and some even over 7ft, Allen stood merely 6ft tall. Compared to these players he was a midget. Despite this handicap, Iverson persisted. Currently he is amongst the elite players in his field. His accomplishments are too numerous to mention but few equal his performance. Iverson didn’t become a basketball star, he became a superstar.

When asked why he was thinking about being a basketball player, considering he was only 6ft, he answered: “I am not wishing to be a basketball player I want to be a basketball player!”

That’s deciding. And that’s exactly what you must do if you want to be successful. So time has come for you to decide. Remember: “Live gives you exactly what you ask of it!” Decide!

Best Wishes;

Next Success Lesson: Step II - You Must Plan! - Stay Tuned.

Happy Holiday!

Hello;

Wishing you a healthy, happy and safe Easter holiday.

Monday 04/17/06 topic: Lesson I - Decide.

Stay tuned

Best wishes;

Lode

Try and try again!

The more I think about it, the more I come to realize that my success is due to only one factor - me. I have never been fortunate enough to have a lucky star smile on me. Everything I got, I got the hard way.

Some people tell you they don’t believe in luck. They say that life is predefined and everything you get is destiny. I refuse to accept that.

I refuse because I find it impossible to imagine that some people are chosen to have the “easy” live while others have to struggle. I do believe that some people are luckier than others.

My dad used to tell me: “Son, to be successful in life you'll need 3 things. 1. You'll need money. 2. You'll need know-how and 3. You'll need luck. And out of those 3 things you better hope and pray you got an abundance of luck. For money you can borrow and know-how you can get from asking questions but luck, you either have it or you don’t.”

Somehow I tend to think he's right. I should know. The knowledge of success that I now have took me over 30 years to acquire. 15 years thereof were nothing but struggle. Part of it I learned and part of it I was taught. Money I made and I lost because of my own carelessness. But luck, I got to say, I've never found a bag of luck laying around, just in case I needed it.

For if it would have I would have used it. And I don't think I would have struggled as hard and as long as I did. People call that “a lucky break”. I never got one.

That's why I am convinced that I am successful today because of my own doing. I didn't quit, I kept on going. No matter how hard or how tough, I picked up the pieces and kept on trying.

I'd like to think that Dr. Schuler has the right idea: “When the going gets tough, the tough get going!” That's what I did. That's what you need to do. Hold on. Don’t quit. Keep going, keep fighting. You'll be surprised how through your own efforts and strength and courage things can and will change for the better from one day to the next.

And should it really not work out after you gave it all you have to give. Then know that at least you can still walk proud because you tried. You really tried.

Believe me when I tell you that 99% of all the people in the world who complain that they are not successful are the same ones that simply don't try; at least not hard enough.

So if you wish to be successful then try and try and try again. Eventually you will be. The old adage holds a lot of truth: “If at first you don’t succeed, try and try again!”

Best Wishes;

Lode

Why should I care? After all, I don't know you ....

Hi;

My name is Lode. I live in Los Angeles, California with my wife and my 2 cats Eezee and Minoo. Together we enjoy a wonderful, happy, successful life. But ..., it wasn't always like that.

It's been said that some people have the Midas touch. You know, anything they lay their hands on turns to gold. I certainly wasn't one of them. In fact, just the opposite was true. Anything I laid my hands on turned to dust.

That's how it used to be. For 15 years I struggled trying to "break through". No matter what I did, I failed. I jumped from one business into another yet success eluded me time and again.

My wife and I argued a lot; almost always about money or at least, the lack there off. These were dark, stressful and tormenting times back then. Yet, I persevered and eventually became very successful. Along the way I learned an awful lot.

The stuff I learned about business, people, money and life in general you can't find in any book and it's not taught in any school. These are the lessons of hard knocks. Lessons that only life can teach you, unless you have a mentor.

With a mentor, success will come a lot sooner. You get to follow a proven path and don't have to figure it all out on your own. I know if I would have had a mentor back then, I would have never spent 15 hard years looking, searching and trying to get success.

With a mentor I would have accomplished my goals in probably 1 or 2 years. A world of difference isn't it?

With your permission I'd like to be your mentor so that you don't stumble and fall the way I did. I want to save you 15 years of trial and error.

It is my wish to help those who are where I once was get to where I am now. Success isn't hard, getting it not knowing how, that's hard.

So, if you're still wondering why I care, eventhough I don't know you? Well, I do know you. I know what it's like to constantly come short. I know all too well the hunting phone calls of bill collectors. I have had many worrysome, sleepness nights.

So as far as I am concerned, I do know you. I know your struggles, I know your pains and I know your frustrations. I know, because I've been there.

Yes, I am successful now. There was a time however when I wasn't. And that's why I know you.


Best Wishes;

Lode